I always wanted a Doctor in the family

Potty Training... Never have 2 words struck such fear and terror into a parents heart. Well there is Drivers License, but I am not there yet.

To steal my sister's borg-ish but clever naming conventions, I shall refer to my kids in the order of their birth. 1of3, 2of3, and 3of3.

1of3 spoiled us; slept through the night 3rd day home, eats whatever is thrown, dropped, spilled, or left on a table days in advance of his coming, and by the age of 2 had fully potty trained himself.

So 2of3 is about to have his 4th birthday and lets just say, we are still very friendly with the Huggies. We've tried a lot of things. He just has this hang up. We can say, “Hey you have to go potty?" and he'll say, "no, I’m ok." and in the same breath, and I say the same breath because he just held it in to turn beet red and give a push. 30 seconds later there is no mistaking the smell.

So last week he gets sick. Get the runs. We give him Imodium AD or whatever the "Dear Lord, save us from the septic waste flowing from my sons butt onto any available surface... QUICK! PICK THE YOUNGEST UP! Too late." This week I hear the unmistakable farts that will lead up to a diaper change and 2of3 walks in and says "My stomach hurts, I need messin."

I look at him in awe and wonder. Is it possible he has just figured out that he can skip potty training if he never releases fecal matter again? After all he can pee in the loo just fine... he can spell his name in the snow for god's sake.

After a bit of investigation, he indeed has figured out that this medicine will prevent him from pooping... sadly though he does not know the price for the immediate glory. Like a clever Djinie in a lamp story, there is always a downside.

1 comment:

Mr Lady said...

You are the ONLY person to get the borg reference!